يٰۤاَيُّهَا الَّذِيْنَ اٰمَنُوْۤا اِنَّ مِنْ اَزْوَاجِكُمْ وَاَوْلَادِكُمْ عَدُوًّا لَّكُمْ فَاحْذَرُوْهُمْ وَاِنْ تَعْفُوْا وَتَصْفَحُوْا وَتَغْفِرُوْا فَاِنَّ اللّٰهَ غَفُوْرٌ رَّحِيْمٌ (14)
Quran Ayah Data not found….for Surah:64, Ayah:14 and Translation:24
Quran Surah:64 Ayah:14
“14. O you who believe, among yourwives and your children there aresome enemies for you, so beware ofthem. And if you forgive and overlookand pardon, then Allah is Most-Forgiving, Very-Merciful.”
According to an authentic tradition, Hazrat Abdullah Bin Abbas (R.T.A.) is reported to have narrated that the verse appearing above was revealed in the backgroiund of those believers who accepted Islam while they were in Makkah, but, they did not responded quickly when after the commandment of migration to Madeenah was revealed. However, whenever they intended to do so their wives and children became a hurdle in their way. Hence, later on, when they came to Madeenah and realized the fact that they had really lagged behind in the cause of religion. Since, it was their wives and children was its main cause, they got too angry and decided to discipline for it. IT was then that Allah, the Almighty guided them to the right direction and recommended to spare and overlook them.
Once when we ponder over the context of this verse, its sense becomes quite clear to us as where it has been said that:
يٰٓاَيُّهَا الَّذِيْنَ اٰمَنُوْٓا اِنَّ مِنْ اَزْوَاجِكُمْ وَاَوْلَادِكُمْ عَدُوًّا لَّكُمْ
“O you who believe, among yourwives and your children there aresome enemies for you.”
It does not necessarily mean that they are our true enemies who wish ill, practice prejudice against us and never miss a chance to harm us, rather, what does it mean is that under the influence of some circumstances, they behave us like the enemies. Taking for instance, if said that Ali is a lion, it does not mean that he has turned to be an animal in physical appearance and he lets out a cry like roaring, rather, it does clearly mean that Ali is as strong and powerful as a lion.
As for the question, how our wives and children turn to be our enemies, there are some points to be considered. They are as follows:
- Since a man’s love towards his wife and children and meeting their demands as well as a desire to raise their living standard compels him to earn as much money as possible, as a result, he ceases to distinguish between right and wrong and thus makes his life to come somehow risky.
- At times, one earns lawful money, but when it comes to spend in the cause of Allah, the Almighty, he grows heedless in it as a result of being concerned with regard to provide his children with ease and comfort and brighten their future. It is for this reason that, in a prophet tradition, the children have been declared as‘مبخلۃ’e. causing miserliness.
- Similarly, when it is demanded to spend something or sacrifice oneselfin the cause of Allah in some emergency case, he is rather concerned to think what will happen to his children after he dies. It is the same thought that becomes hurdle in his way resulting in miserliness in his heart.
- Since, at times, one’s love towards his children and concern regarding the safety of their property causes leading one to a heinous sin and perpetration of something which may prove for him beneficial in this world, but causes a great harm to the religion, faith and the entire Muslim nation as also substantiated by an event of Hatib bin AbiBultah (R.T.A.) during the blessed time of the Holy Prophet ﷺ.
In a nutshell, when the chieftains of Quraishviolated the pledges made on the treaty of Hudaibiyah, the Holy Prophet ﷺbegan to make preparations for invadingMakkah. In reality, it was somethingwhich should have been kept in dark against the enemies, but, Hatib bin AbiBulta’ah (R.T.A.) thought that if he let it out to the chieftains of Makkah, they would deem it a favour and thus would make no harm to his family members. For this purpose, he wrote a letter and handed it over to a woman heading to Makkah to communicate it to its chieftains. Later on, Allah, the Almighty informed the Holy Prophet ﷺabout it through revelation after which he sent Hazrat Ali (R.T.A.) too along with some other blessed companions in order to get the letter back from that woman.
Conclusively, all it happened due to love of HazratHatib bin AbiBulta’h (R.T.A.) towards his wife and children. Imagine what a great harm it might have caused to the Muslims only if this piece of information would have been reached to the enemies!
Thus, there are many other cases similar to the one mentioned above which causes one’s children and wife liken to the enemies. It is for this reason that once the Holy Prophet ﷺlaid out the same fact saying, “Your enemy is not one whom if you kill it will be counted to be great accomplishment or if he kills you it will cause you enter Paradise, rather, may be your true enemy is your own child who was given birth by you, thereafter, your greatest enemy is your property which you possess.”
One can easily surmise what a great harm the negligence taking place due to his wife and children may cause through prophetic tradition as follows:
In the phrase فَاحْذَرُوْهُمْa man has been warned against the same negligence mentioned above taking place due to one’s wife and children, since it may result in an utter loss. The same thing has been pointed out at another place. Says Allah, the Almighty:
يٰۤاَيُّهَا الَّذِيْنَ اٰمَنُوْا لَا تُلْهِكُمْ اَمْوَالُكُمْ وَلَاۤ اَوْلَادُكُمْ عَنْ ذِكْرِ اللّٰهِ وَمَنْ يَّفْعَلْ ذٰلِكَ فَاُولٰٓئِكَ هُمُ الْخٰسِرُوْنَ (9)
Quran Ayah Data not found….for Surah:63, Ayah:9 and Translation:24
Quran Surah:63 Ayah:9
“9. O you who believe, your riches andyour children must not divert you fromthe remembrance of Allah. And thosewho do that are the losers.”
Of course, to a believer, Allah’s pleasure and success in the world Hereafter occupies the greatest importance and even the sacrifice of his wife and children is nothing for him as compared to it. Hence, rather than allowing them to be a hurdle in this noble cause, one must sacrifice them when required as also implied through the ideal brought forth by Hazrat Ibrahim (A.S.), who was ready to sacrifice his only son, Hazrat Ismail (A.S.) in compliance with Allah’s commandment. He was not least concerned to think what will happen to his son and his mother, HazratHajirahwhen he left them alone in a desolate and barren land. The same response should be on our behalf when it comes to sacrificing our wife and children in the cause of Allah, the Almighty and His true religion.
Another important thing pointed out through the following sentence وَاِنْ تَعْفُوْا وَتَصْفَحُوْا وَتَغْفِرُوْا is that since even your children are but human, always tending to err,hence, rather than punishing or being extremely strict to them when they commit any mistake or cause any harm to you based on their shortcoming, negligence and disobedience, one must spare and overlook them and make possible attempts to discipline them so that they too prove to be a means of support to him in the cause of Allah and His religion.
From the paraphrase for sparing one used here is does apparently indicates that all of them are synonym with each other and the same thing is explained in the same way, but, the reality is that all these three words point out to three stages. Thus, the first way of taking someone to the task is to punish him. It is for this reason that by employing the words وَاِنْ تَعْفُوْا, it has been recommended to spare them.
The lower way to bring someone to the book through scolding rather than punishing him and hence using the words وَتَصْفَحُوْا, it has been forbidden to do so, in other words, the better way of sparing is recommended as compared to the first one.Similarly, the lowest way of bringing someone to the task is to spare one making him realize his mistake rather than scolding or threatening him. Thus, using the words وَتَغْفِرُوْا, not to allow the mistake committed by someone to the public linen, since the perpetrator deems the preservation of his dignity in this way, on the top of it, the one who spared him is regarded to be more respectable in his eyes and thus he is inclined towards correcting himself. Hence, the best way of behaving anyone results in the best outcome. Therefore, it has been recommended to employ all the ways step by step.